So after the weirdness that was Saturday night, we had just about had it with partying and fun (not really).

Our first stop Sunday night was Paint It Pink’s XANADON’T party at Dark Lady. Honestly, it didn’t disappoint! Although it was a weird mix of that straight PIP crowd and older (much older) gays, and a bunch of girls (who should NOT be wearing tights) dressed like Cyndi Lauper bouncing around — it was sparkly and pink, which is always good. We told Noah ourselves that if this was the future, that it was a fabulous, dancy-disco future, indeed. Then out comes Jackie Collins to sing Last Dance, and everyone goes absolutely nuts. We caught up with Jackie after her performance, who was lovely as usual — only to find out that girlfriend is a Bitchidence.com reader, which is weird because we were convinced that only like ten people read this shit. Before we left though, we caught Buck from Dark Lady about to leave and head down to Therapy with a tranny porn DVD that Chris Harris had requested (yes, specifically tranny porn) to be played on the screens throughout the night. What? Why? We told Buck that he probably had misunderstood Harris’s text since Buck’s asian-import iPhone had a habit of texting chinese characters back and forth instead of normal english (that’s another completely weird story).

So then around 1a we hit up State to see the bar boys and DJ AV8, which unfortunately was the forgotten bastard-child event of the night. This did not surprise us — but you bitches will be glad it’s there come this Sunday when you don’t have Military Ball and Xanadon’t to keep you out at all hours of the night. But we hung out there regardless and helped the boys close up the bar — and rolled up to Therapy around 2a with the place’s owner, Alex Tomasso, who gave the entire door staff a coronary when he waved about six of us through the door without tickets or being on lists or anything. Bitch, we can’t imagine getting into Therapy any other way!

If you know us, you’ll know that our first stop upon arrival was the bar upstairs. Although we were afraid of being a little late since it was already after 2a, so we sleazed around only to find Kitty Litter and her entourage crowding around a cluster of liquor bottles and an ice bucket stationed uneasily on a table in the middle of those black couches in the back. Bitch poured us a strong one and we were off — only to find out that they kept the bar open way late, which we then took advantage of regardless of already having a drink in-hand. You know???

This was the biggest Military Ball turn-out we’d ever seen, everyone seemed to make it down there (although Sarah Beyers and Parrys Hampton were suspiciously absent) despite a prior week of bitching about it being so far or not knowing where to go. Nobody seemed to have any trouble come Sunday.

So Jenna St. James is chilling in the girl’s bathroom doing her business when the stall next to her starts to shake and thump, growing louder and louder like someone’s in there fucking or something. Then suddenly the stall door flies open, and some naked kid shoots ass-backward out of the stall and falls on the floor — it gets better — then some bigger, older, fully dressed man steps out of the stall, steps over the poor, used kid, looks back down at him, and walks out of the fucking bathroom without saying a word! We totally expect this behavior at Therapy, but you can’t help but ask — who are these fucking people!?

Last year we were allowed full access to the DJ booth to mix drinks and whatnot, but this year everyone was denied access, which of course didn’t stop us. You bitches didn’t miss anything though, it was just Johnny Vicious and a bunch of Ultra hoes, although we did watch Nina Flowers’ performance from up there, which was fabulous, if a little spastic (we thought she was going to fall right off that damn stage). We didn’t get a chance to talk with Nina afterwards, but we heard from several people that she’s an absolute doll to speak with — which is nice to hear because she looks like she’d be a huge bitch.

We didn’t make it into the back of any of those hallways, in fact we were barely downstairs at all, except for that outside smoking area — which was completely hysterical to go hang out in. We walked out there, and spied Buck from Dark Lady again in the back talking with local scumbag Tim French. So Kitty Litter walks up behind us and we ask her exactly what Buck is doing talking to Tim French. We shit not, Kitty says “I don’t know but I’m going to stop it!” — and bitch goes over and drags poor Bucky away by the hand. Denied!

Obviously, a good/weird time was had by all. We don’t know what time we left, but it was light out and the sun was shining in when you opened the doors. That’s always an…. unpleasant feeling. Thank you, Chris Harris? Jenna St. James said it best to us, “exactly who do we have to blame for this???”. You know???

We love it! And can’t wait for Deborah Cox at Lupo’s in a few weeks!